Pieces of Callyrose

On Saturday, Chad and Christina brought sweet, beautiful Ruby home from Ethiopia..and they also brought precious pieces of Callyrose to us too.  They brought us pictures and stories...we learned that she is shy, but with enough coaxing, lights up with eyes bright and smiles sweet.  We discovered that she is a girlie girl who LOVED the tulle dress we sent for her - feeling it with her fingers and swaying proudly in it when put on her.  She is a bundle of cuddles who clutched the little doll, blanket and ball we sent tightly to her chest.   We have combed over the pictures they took - finding with delight that her smile mirrors that of Arabelle's.  Realizing that she is a peanut in size and stature and... that she.is.just.perfect.in.every.way.  These moments that they spent with her mean so much in an adoption world where such little information is ever given.

 Before, she was my little girl in my head and heart and by a picture sent to me from my agency.  I knew nothing about her personality, her person...just that she was ours and that we loved her.  Now, I have bits and pieces...now I can picture her smile and know that it is brought on by wearing princess dresses.  I look at her holding her baby doll tightly and can envision her sitting in our living room, with her sisters, feeding pretend babies with pretend baby bottles. 

We know that we will meet our little girl at some point...but it was such a gift to get to know her just a little.  (Thank you Chad and Christina!!)  And it caused such an ache in our hearts.  I long for her...more than I ever thought possible.  We have had no news on our paperwork.  Our agency is doing everything they can but the paperwork is just not moving forward like it should.  And so we continue to wait, pray and hope. 

This morning I read James 1 and the words leapt from the page: "Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance."   I have read this verse many times before and I am ashamed to admit that my main thought was: "I am not sure that having my faith grow is worth going through a trial."  But the commentary I was reading made me look at this verse differently.

"Faith is tested through trials, not produced by trials. Trials reveal what faith we do have, not because God doesn’t know how much faith we have, but to make our faith evident to ourselves and those around us."  (enduringword.com)

Evident to ourselves and those around us.  I have witnessed this faith in Chad and Christina.  In Matt and Noelle.  In Ryan and Jenna.  In Keri and in Alanna...the list goes on and on.  Their faith has encouraged me and has challenged me.  And so I will keep their perseverance at the front of my mind as we wait.